


Library Doctors

by crazyphalanges



Category: Banana Fish (Anime & Manga)
Genre: M/M, first fic, in denial about the ending, let them be happy please
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-01-17
Updated: 2019-01-17
Packaged: 2019-10-11 14:35:50
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,107
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17448872
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/crazyphalanges/pseuds/crazyphalanges
Summary: Ash was never good at asking for help. As he’s clutching Eiji’s letter in one hand and his bleeding stomach in another, he decides that maybe it’s time to learn.Alternatively: Ash calls a fucking ambulance.





	Library Doctors

**Author's Note:**

> The ending we all wished happened. (I literally just finished the series and I'm in so much pain rn).
> 
> This is my first fic. Thanks for clicking on this!

The cold New York air flutters the papers in his hand. Ash straightens them out, eyes drinking in Eiji’s words, Eiji’s cramped and looping hand-writing. Eiji’s love, which he doesn’t deserve and will never deserve but now, with that love- unabashed and unwavering like he is- wrapping warm arms around him, no reservation can save him from drowning.

The paper is fluttering again, but not from the wind. Ash’s hands tremble as he clutches onto the letter, but he barely notices as each word rushes up to him.

Like a gasp of arctic air after an eternity spent sweltering, Ash realizes. And God, how could he have been so stupid, so blinded by his own ugliness and self-hate to realize that the one he would hand the world over to protect is the one shielding him, and that this- this this this this this is all that really matters?

Ash springs up from the bench, sprinting down the stairs and the sidewalk, calculating the amount of time he’d have to get to the airport, what he’d say when he saw him again, how hard he’d need to apologize. But mostly, he thinks about his smile, that sweet thing of beauty in his eyes as he says his name. And there’s sunshine in Ash’s body now, there’s sunshine and lightning and spring wind and the red laughter of dawn, and it’s Eiji Eiji Eiji _Eiji Eij_ -

A knife sinks into his gut.

There is no pain, just the coldness of the blade and the warmth of the blood gushing out. He turns his head to meet Lao’s eyes and his drawn brows. “...why?” Lao asks. “Why… didn’t you see me coming…?! You ain’t ever let your guard down before. What the hell happened to you…?!”

- _Eiji_.

Ash reaches for the gun tucked into his waistband, presses it into Lao’s gut and pulls the trigger. They both stand hunched over, huffing, hands pressed against their wounds.

“... you missed all my vital organs, you idiot…” Ash grits out, shaking.

“So did you, asshole,” Lao says, wobbling onto the wall behind him. “Good enough, though. Neither of us is gonna make it.”

Lao looks up, exhaling, then back down again. With strength leaving his body along with life, he breathes out before slumping down onto the concrete, “Sorry about this… but I just… couldn’t let you… kill Sing…”

Sing? Sing? He’s going to die because of a stupid misunderstanding? All that sunshine, that lightning and spring and dawn gone… because of a tiny mistake in communication? When the mafia and crazy mercenaries failed to kill him, a stab wound from some insignificant side character is the thing that does him- Ash fucking Lynx- in. How pathetic.

But the outrage doesn’t last long, because he catches sight of Eiji’s papers on the floor and the wind trying to blow them away, and he falls to his knees, scrabbling to get them back in his grip. With shaking fingers, he shifts through them until he finds where he left off.

As he drinks in his words again, his mind is once again filled with Eiji. Eiji’s smile, his determined eyes, his arms around him. Eiji. How would he react when he finds out about Ash’s death? How long would he grieve? How much would he cry?

Didn’t Ash promise himself to never let Eiji cry again?

He finishes reading the letter- My soul will always be with you. A tear trickles down his cheek, falling and mingling with the blood staining the paper. The edges of his vision begin to darken. Ash looks up at the sky.

He thinks he sees Eiji’s smile in the glare of the sun, and suddenly death seems like a whole lot of bullshit.

Gritting his teeth, Ash forces the black out of his sight. He needs an ambulance- but with how fast he’s bleeding, it’s highly unlikely he’ll survive even if he calls one. Okay, what other options did he have? He was nowhere near any of his friends. And plus, most of them were seeing Eiji off right now- and what would they be able to do even if they came?

“Fuck,” Ash spits out. Was there really no way? No- he’d survived through much worse, much more harrowing situations. No way is he not surviving this. He’s Ash Lynx. The world wouldn’t let him die even if he wanted to.

Ash was never good at asking for help. As he’s clutching Eiji’s letter in one hand and his bleeding stomach in another, he decides that maybe it’s time to learn.

He drags himself up the stone steps leading up to the library. The pain begins to set in now, and the burning in his abdomen makes him gasp and stumble until he almost falls back down the stairs. But he makes it up, and then pushes his trembling legs into the library. He limps to the check out counter, the young lady sitting behind it’s eyes widening as she takes in the red all over his body.

“Please,” he gasps out. “Help me.”

“N-n-n-n-nine one one! Someone call nine-one-one!” she screams, and the library flies into chaos.

Ash falls to the ground. Through his blurry vision, once again black around the edges, he can make out a crowd of faces gathered around him. There’s a ringing in his ears, and each inhale is pure pain.

“Move outta the way! I’m a doctor!” a lady’s voice breaks through the crowd, and then there’s hands pressing over his body, and brown hair filling his vision. “Stay with me, kid, stay with me. Shit, how’d you get such a deep wound?”

Ash’s head lolls to the side, and his eyelids flutter. He can only see in blurs of colors now, scenery indistinguishable from people, but still Eiji’s bright eyes shine at him. A smile tugs at the corners of his mouth. His eyelids droop down, and the cool of night breeze engulfs him.

“Ei… ji…”

_I’m coming._

\---

When he blinks open his eyes, it’s to the faces of the people he loves. Max, Sing, Nadia, Alex, and the rest of his gang are gathered around his bed. Max is the first to notice that he’s awake.

“Ash,” he breathes out, eyes widening. Then, rising from his seat, he yells, “Ash!”

His friends all cry out, falling over him in laughter and tears. Max all but smothers him in a hug, and Nadia is wiping tears from the corners of her eyes. _You are not alone, Ash_. He smiles at them.

When they finally calm down, he turns to Max and says, “I need a ticket to Tokyo. Now.”


End file.
